Thought I would post a bit from my old art journal here as well – please remember this an old writing, from 2002:
I am the one who:
You chased out of your life and your heart. I am still me – still as lovely, beatiful, now lonely, not scary or ominous. But you have closed me off and made me shut out – wrapped in a net of your devising. But I am the one who is trapped in it and must free myself from it. I need some scoissors to cut up this web of your making – your lies and deceit and fear of who I am. I cannot use them to hurt you though, only to free myself.
_______
About a year after I wrote this:
I’ve cut through and removed your net – now I am free to just be myself. I won’t bother you anymore, and your feelings about me will not bother me anymore. I cannot change what you think or feel – I can only be responsible for myself and my feelings. I’ve put away my scissors now, I don’t need them anymore. I am glad your scissors are no longer around to slice me apart.
________
I never did complete the art that went with this piece of writing. Perhaps at first it was too painful, and later it wasn’t necessary. Suffice to say the year of pain was enough, and whatever art may come from it, or surface within my art even now, I do not know.
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