One of my most favorite blogs EVHAR has returned!! Woot! Go enjoy….
Fafblog! back to save the universe.
It’s time for another edition of BARACK OBAMA: THE FINAL THROES! Last week Giblets revealed the dangerous levels of pussification inherent in Obama’s bowling skills and orange juice consumption while exploring the damage done by persistent rumors that the senator is secretly black. But this latest scandal has doomed the Obama campaign more than any dooming doom that has doomed it before, because this time Obama has Insulted America by saying that poor people in impoverished rural areas are somehow “bitter” about being poor and impoverished. For shame!
Well Giblets knows the real Americans of the heartland, Barack Obama. He has flown over them and driven past them and grimaced amiably in their direction on the way to hotel rooms on numerous occasions, and in that time he has come to appreciate their primitive yet unique culture. These salt-of-the-earth folk don’t need your condescending liberal elitism to tell them how they feel! They need Giblets’s condescending conservative elitism to tell them how they feel! These people aren’t “bitter.” Far from it! America’s impoverished working class are a chipper and cheerful lot, prancing and scampering about their foreclosed homes and crumbling industrial sectors with a spirit of adorable pluckiness, smiling and laughing through their unemployment and their black lung disease like a pack of hardscrabble leprechauns!1 And Giblets is sure they are outraged to hear Barack Obama imply otherwise – just as he is sure they are even outraged-er to hear Obama scorn their honest midwestern folkways, mocking the simple beauty of their long, proud tradition of recreational possum-killing and their homey, heartfelt gay-bashing! Well Giblets has a long if purely theoretical love of our nation’s yahoo population and their mysterious ways, and would be proud to join them himself were he not so busy wiping their hideous yokel-germs off him with copious quantities of hand sanitizer.
2 Responses
I have pretty much tuned out the political stuff in recent weeks.
When the campaigns arrive at a point where any utterance at all is seized upon by the other side as insulting to some group, and then used as a weapon to say the opponent is “unqualified,” they show that running for office is nothing but megalomania, and has nothing to do at all with an urge to do public service.
The best policy for them, and us, would be to never utter a word at any time about anything.
Yeah, that would be good. Don’t think they get that option, though.
You have to pretty much be an egomaniac to run for office at all. I doubt it is much fun to sit through 5,000 chicken dinners with that same damn chocolate mousse….