I wish that I knew from the very first–from childhood–how short life is and how few rules there really are. People think there are all these rules they have to follow about how they spend their days and what they wear and what their house looks like, but it’s not true. You have to follow the law, so you won’t get arrested–not much creative about that!–and you have to make money to pay the bills, so you’ll have a place to sleep and take a shower. And you need to wear clothes so you won’t catch cold. But beyond that, there’s so much leeway–so many choices that we don’t take advantage of! You don’t have to wear what’s in fashion–you may have to dress a certain way for work, but that’s just 40 hours a week. And you don’t have to paint your walls eggshell, and you don’t have to watch all the hot shows on TV. You don’t have to answer the phone just because it rings, and you don’t have to have a doorbell. You can invent a life that works for you and the people you love. If you don’t have to have a Hummer, then maybe you can take a job that pays a lot less but gives you the freedom to take off a month to volunteer in South America or Africa, or go backpacking through some other country, if that’s your dream. We believe that we have to make a ton of money to buy the things we see advertised on TV (can you tell I’m not a big fan of TV?), and that keeps us chained to a job that drains us. Remember what I said about sometimes feeling guilty for not earning more money? I have plenty of money for the things I need; it’s that I sometimes think there are other things I’m supposed to have that require more from me–a bigger car, a fancy house, grown-up clothes. This doesn’t happen very often–but even for me, there’s that voice, that idea that there are things to which I should aspire that would make me give up the creative life for a more traditional one.
So the advice I would give them: start living your real life as soon as possible. Find out who you are, what you like, what makes your soul sing. Get more of that. As long as you aren’t abandoning your family–human, furred, feathered, whatever–then it’s OK. Get rid of what you don’t need, ease out of relationships that sap your soul, give up the things that don’t really matter. And then spend the time and energy you gain on the things that make you feel most yourself, most in touch with the universe.
— Rice Freeman-Zachery
No Responses